Wednesday, October 17, 2012

Shit Does Happen

Eyyyy A.W. so I kind of like you, I kind of love yu and yea so love me back? Yea noooo. At this point I give up on men. They are the only thing that brings so much grief in my life. Too many times I'm like oh when I lose these 20 pounds and find me a man I'll be good. But I need to be good as I am right now. I have a Bachelor's degree, a great paying job with benefits, I can buy literally whatever I want, good health, man have God! Yes, God! It's hard to let him go but I must. Sanity gone. Security gone. Self confidence gone. Grief yes. Tears yes. Hate yes. It's all there and I'm going out of my mind for him. I was at my lowest in Seattle, and now it's like I can't be vulnerable I have to lock up my feelings and forget about them. Feelings only bring problems. I want to choke him and for him to cuddle me. It's nada now though. Time to give up. Oh September 17th, you were the worst day ever for me.